What Would You Do??

Yesterday my husband (R) had an interesting experience that I want to share with you. It was one of those super hot 100+ days so (R) took the kids bowling for an indoor activity. I was out with my girlfriends so it was just him and 3 kids. At the end of bowling my daughter (L) started having a tantrum. In that time they also decided to get ice cream. L was crying the entire drive to Yogurtland and continued to do so at Yogurtland. R told L, I will get you ice cream when you stop crying so we can talk. Of course L would not stop so R bought ice cream for the boys and himself and they went to sit down. He kept telling her to stop crying so they can talk and then he will get her ice cream.

In that time a lady who was having ice cream with her older daughter (pre-teen maybe?) and husband walked up to my daughter and said “Sweetie, are you ok? Is there something you want to tell me”” L does not do well with strangers so she immediately backed up into her dad. This women proceeded to tell R that what he was doing was unfair, they are all eating ice cream and this little girl does not get any. She looked at my daughter and said “Do you want me to buy you ice cream?” Which R then proceeded to tell her, this is not about the money, this is about her behavior and she knows that she will get her ice cream when she stops crying and starts talking.

I was shocked that R stayed so calm in this situation, but he even explained what his whole purpose was. He told the woman that he has to treat all his kids the same, so if one is not behaving, they have to deal with it before they get what they want. Just because she is the youngest and a girl does not mean that she can get away with her behavior and our boys need to know that and see that. They know if they were acting that way, he would have done the same to them.

The part that shocked me was that someone had the gall to interfere in a family situation. She has no idea what is going on butI think she needed to stay out because it does not involve her. I also think that if it were me in that situation and not my husband, no one would come up to a mom and interfere. It is because he is a man that she felt the need to meddle. Its almost like she thought my husband treats boys well and does not treat girls well (almost like that traditional Indian mentality). Which of course she has no idea what our family dynamics are and its none of her business. If only she knew that L and R have a special bond, she is totally “daddy’s little girl.” I was in disbelief when he told me what happened. I was actually mad and would have told the lady to butt out. There was nothing sinister going on which she implied by asking L “Is there something you want to tell me?”

Would you involve yourself if you saw that going on?